Monthly Archives: January 2012

Breaking and Entering

It’s 9:30 at night and I’ve just spent about an hour trying to explain to mum that she’s not going anywhere. I found her handbag and coat laid out on the bed and when I asked her why, she said she had to be ready for the bus to the Day Centre. This is a repetition of what happened a few weeks ago.

She had been a bit unsettled all day. I was out all morning and when I got home, her coat was hanging on the back of a chair. She said she’d got it ready to go out. I just told her she wasn’t going out and she seemed to accept it at the time.

Eventually I told her she should perhaps go to bed but similarly to what occurred on 3rd Jan, she didn’t seem to recognise her home. I finally lost the plot somewhat and telephoned my sister, Jean, for assistance. Mum spoke to Jean who tried to explain exactly the same way I had. Mum said ‘OK’, then a moment later, ‘I think we should go in a taxi.’

Eventually she accepted that she had to go to bed but wanted me to send a note to the Day Centre as they would think it strange someone had broken in and slept in their beds. I gave up explaining at this point.

Leave a comment

Posted by on January 31, 2012 in Diary


Drinking Enough?

We had our visit to the Continence Clinic today. To be honest I don’t think mum needed to go there really but the Psychiatric Nurse had suggested it after mum told her she has the occasional accident. Luckily we haven’t quite reached that stage yet although I guess we’ll get there eventually!

It was all quite relaxed and didn’t really matter that the input/output hadn’t been recorded. The funniest part of the appointment was when the Nurse asked mum if she thought she drank enough. Mum asked if she was including alcohol, so the Nurse asked how much alcohol she drank. “Well I have a sherry every day at 5 o’clock then ……….” I interrupted and said “she occasionally has a small bianco in the evening” not wanting to admit that she has quite a large bianco nearly every evening.

Nurse also asked if mum was watching her weight. Mum and I answered “No” in unison. Admittedly she is very overweight but one thing she really enjoys is her food and is it actually worth cutting down her food and alcohol at this stage? I think not.

1 Comment

Posted by on January 26, 2012 in Diary


The Wardrobe Battle

OK…so we abandoned the monitoring of liquids in and out. I called the clinic and they said it was fine. Pessimistically I suspect that any problems mum has in this direction are purely to do with her age and illness, and it seems unlikely that there will be any magic answer.

I am not happy today! Mum appeared dressed in trousers and a thin, short-sleeved summer t-shirt this morning. I hung all her summer things on a high rail to discourage her from wearing them but it didn’t work. She told me she has no long-sleeved tops so we went into her room and counted 14. She then got this stubborn look which I’m beginning to get used to. “I’ll wear what I want” she said. I told her she was behaving like a child and tried to have a rational conversation with her, explaining that it is not reasonable to wear summer clothes in the winter, especially as she will then put the heating on when she becomes cold. I pointed out that I live here too and am generally much warmer than her so it gets very uncomfortable for me with the heating on.

That’s an understatement. It is a constant battle between us. I know she’s bound to be cold because she sits in her chair and does nothing all day. I try to encourage her to move around a bit but it all falls on deaf ears. I then start to feel guilty because I don’t take her out enough. However, the truth is I often ask her if she wants to go out and she says no.

Leave a comment

Posted by on January 25, 2012 in Diary


Input and Output

Taking Mum for an appointment at the Continence Clinic in a few days but prior to that we have to monitor all her drinks (input) and urine (output) for 3 days so we commenced this interesting exercise this morning. It had all gone horribly wrong by about 11 am! The concept of measuring her urine in a jug (particularly during the night) is lost on mum and I can’t be forever asking her where she’s going or has she been. I may have to fudge the figures and hope for the best.

I must confess I hate all this intimate medical stuff and I’m sure I’m not alone in this. What if it was my Dad I was looking after, or if my brother was looking after mum full-time. It’s all very difficult. I’m just not used to discussing such personal things with mum, nor do I want to become used to it!

1 Comment

Posted by on January 21, 2012 in Diary


An Impromptu Holiday

My sister told me that when she called in yesterday, mum told her that she’d been to Scotland on the coach that morning! OK… Celebrity Coach Trip also goes into Room 101! Actually they’d been to Slovenia, not Scotland!

Leave a comment

Posted by on January 20, 2012 in Diary



The Lost Bag

I went out this morning but have spent afternoon with mum. She was fine until just before we had tea. She was watching Airline on TV and as has happened before, the lines between reality and the TV have become blurred. Mum suddenly said she’d couldn’t find the lady she was sitting with and also she’d lost her handbag. I reminded her that she was watching a TV programme and she seemed to accept it.

I went outside for 10 mins and when I came back in she was in tears. I went over to give her a hug and asked her what was the matter. She said she was scared as she’d lost her handbag at the airport. Also she didn’t recognise where she was. I tried to reassure her but each time she would say she was okay then a minute later she asked me to go and look for her bag. This happened at least 10 times within half an hour. I took her to the cupboard where she keeps her handbags to show her that they were all there along with her purse. Eventually she said she felt a bit better and she recognised her flat again.

This is the second very similar incident within the past few weeks. Very distressing for both mum and myself as I seem to be powerless to put her mind at rest immediately. Hope this doesn’t happen too often when mum’s alone.

It seems there are less and less TV programmes that I’m happy for mum to watch as they seem to have some sort of weird effect on her. Casualty, Come Dine with Me and Airline are all off the menu.

Leave a comment

Posted by on January 16, 2012 in Diary



Supper Subterfuge!

Last night Mum decided to make herself some bread and butter for supper. I do tend to discourage her from having supper as she is somewhat overweight, so she tends to eat secretly in the kitchen, thinking that I am unaware of her little subterfuge!

I went into the fridge afterwards – the butter was open with a slice of bread on top of it and the lid on a separate shelf. Little things but very odd.

Today she has slept on and off constantly. I keep waking her up, suggesting activities and making her cups of coffee. She doesn’t want to go out so I give up in the end. Does this mean she’ll be up in the night or am I paranoid?

Leave a comment

Posted by on January 15, 2012 in Diary